Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Multiplicity
I was away this past weekend (my first time EVER away from the kids and hubby for 48 hours!! -- first time ever away from Kira ....), and while I was gone, Jeff straightened the house, removed our bedframe, organized better our bedroom, AND took the kids to Disney Saturday and Sunday!!!! I think he multiplied himself or something.
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Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Teaching (and Learning) Life Lessons
While visiting PHAT Mommy's blog, a site I sometimes visit for inspiration, ideas, and just to spend some time, I came across a link from her site entitled "27 Skills Your Child Needs to Know That She's Not Getting In School". Intrigued, I went ahead and visited the link, and found a good list of skills that I'd like to give my children in life.
Of the ones they mentioned, I think we're already working on several, and need to be more proactive on others:
1) Financial: Jeff and I haven't specifically worked on this with Parker, though we've been talking about allowance recently. I think this is one of those really important ones that we still feel a little crippled by -- we've talked off and on about investing, but are still clueless enough to continue to not move forward with this.
2) Thinking: We do a lot of reading and discussing things out, so I think we're at least on the right track here. Perhaps we're still at too young an age to explore this more fully?
3) Success: I can't help but think this is something that is cultivated, not taught, and that the root of it is self-esteem. We are trying to instill the best self-esteem possible in our children, and hopefully this will be reflected in motivation and passion. My personal opinion is that procrastination is a learned problem. I know that I am a procrastinator, and part of that is due to fear of failure for some things, and the fact that it doesn't take me long to do others, and why do it before the due date or you'll be given busy work (the latter was learned very early for me in school).
4) Social: Being an "attachment parent" has led to really focusing on the social aspects, especially positive discipline, learning to express feelings instead of using hurtful actions, working together, sharing, etc. We use a lot of compassion/love talk, and although we do have occassional issues, especially with the two as siblings, they do pretty well in other settings. There is always continued work to do, especially in modeling how to resolve situations where feelings overshadow facts.
5) Practical: Oh, we're all learning this at the same time. I think it is an advantage to being home with the children -- they get to see what is involved in "keeping a house". Now the car part is also valuable, but we're not equipped to teach that.
6) Happiness: It feels that this is where our focus has switched lately, and it is also linked inextricably to the other categories. We've become much more involved in our community, including finding a spiritual home for our family (we became members this past Sunday of the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Gainesville -- neither Jeff nor I have ever been members of an organized "church" of any kind before, so this is a pretty big step!). We (Jeff and I) are trying to be more in the present, and not so much worrying about the future, but that is harder, especially as a homeschooler, I think!
All in all, I think this is a great list to provide food for thought. I don't know that all of them can be taught as much as modeled, though, but luckily we still have a bit of time.
Labels: community, family, homeschooling, Jeff, Kristin, spirituality
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Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Family Ties
I have to say that I am glad that we have two kids, and that one is a boy and one is a girl. It really is cliche, but this way, we get to experience parenting a child like each of us (abstractly, at least) and also the sibling relationship that we both had as well.
Having had a boy first was something that seemed to be a challenge for us, at least when we were first told. I have to say that we were pretty lucky to have the opportunity to make friends with other new moms who also had boys. It really helped us through the tough, insecure times.
Now Kira, she really does seem to be a mini-me. Heaven help me. She is a little scamp, can be as sweet as possible, and is really starting to develop her own ideas of the world.
We have to see how her personality continues to develop. So far, she's pretty amenable to most things that Parker wants to do. But if family history is any indication, that will change, as it did for me with my older sister, and then all bets are off.
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Thursday, December 14, 2006
Nine Years Ago Yesterday ...
Jeff and I were married!! It really doesn't seem like it has been that long, which is a good thing, and yet we've both aged SO much!!
What is MORE interesting (I think), is our wedding party -- what has happened to them and if we are still in touch.
From left to right:
Maddie: married now for several years, just officially adopted her husband's two teen children; now pregnant with her first child.
Jim: No Clue. Lost touch, and he has a common name, so we can't find him.
Vici: went on to have two girls, Madi who is 7 and just was part of her first play, and Alli, who is half-a-year younger than Parker. She is now pregnant ("surprise!!") with a third girl.
Brad: No Clue. Lost touch, attempts to reconnect have failed.
Shelli: my sister; moved to two other jobs, and is now in Tennessee. She's pursuing her certification to be a scuba diver.
David: went on an across the country movie trip, without telling anyone but his sister -- she is currently working legal aid in Afghanistan, and he and she visit frequently. He is working at a food delivery place.
Me/Jeff.
Ryan: Got into and finished med school, and is now a resident up north in neurology. He and wife (girlfriend at time of our wedding) moved up there together. We suspect children once his residency is complete.
Heather: Has been married and divorced, and continuing to working at JCPenney's as an inventory supervisor during a night shift.
Stephen: Converted to catholicism, got married, just had first baby. Finding success in writing/editing for a gaming magazine.
Maelanie: Married soon after we did to another Lobby friend, became vegetarian, converted to 7th Day Adventist, and currently has no kids (originally wanted kids before 30, don't know current plans). She is a counselor at a Christian-based pregnancy support center.
Phil: Completed his Masters, moved to San Francisco, came out, and is now happily living and dating.
Jenna: Jeff's sister; graduated high school, went to college, switched colleges, switched back and moved in with boyfriend, graduated, got accepted to same college for grad school, got engaged, will be married in the Spring.
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Wednesday, November 29, 2006
About Sickness and Kids
So, we're in week 3 of sickness (which I just misspelled suckness, and I'm not sure why I changed!!) We've had a few bouts of "okay", but we're now in full-blown yucky over here! Parker still has a bad cough (though it gets better every day), Jeff is so miserable he's staying home tomorrow (all the better to try and get ME sick, I believe), and Kira is snotty and sweaty, and just ... blech! I really can't wait for wellness to come back. I am just hoping that we can all stay well for the week of/after Christmas when we're at Disney!!! I'm longing to be back in the "land of the living".
For those of you whose children are in school, how much time have they had to be out because of sickness? What are your school's policies on NOT coming to school? I honestly can't imagine if Parker were in school ... he'd have missed 1/4 to 1/3 of all classes so far!!
And the thought that being in a school setting builds one's immune system is valid, unless you have an underlying issue, like asthma, that means repeated ER trips, steroids, breathing up to 60 times a minute, etc. Every time someone around Parker gets sick, he does, and it is 50 times worse. He's been sick plenty and should have an awesome immune system, but his lungs protest.
Kira has rarely been sick, in fact when she gets sick it is so minor in comparison to Parker, that Jeff and I honestly are amazed each and every time.
In terms of this time, no, we haven't taken him in, but we've been in contact with the doctor's office, and it hasn't been for three weeks straight. It was for 3 days, 4 days well (Thurs thru Sun) -- Week 1. Starting to get sick for 1.5 days, then lethargy and illness for .5 day with high fever, and then 2 days of recovery (and to make sure he wasn't still contagious, and wasn't compromised immune to immediately catch something else), and three days of well (Fri thru Sun) -- Week 2. Then, well-ish for 2 days (occasional cough/sneeze), then moderate fever end of day 3, sick day 4 (Thanksgiving) including a 3-hour nap, cough for the rest of that week and into this one -- Week 3/4.
In terms of possible allergens, we do have many potential allergens (cats, carpets, stuffed animals), but the only thing that triggers him is getting sick. He always has the cold first. Once his coughing starts, it quickly progresses to rapid breathing that often won't calm down. He's never had issues with anything else, and the one time we thought he was having an issue with running around in the cold here (it was in the lower 50s), he was sick with fever the next day, so it was more than likely the combination of already having a virus along with the activity and cold. Our pediatrician considers him to have mild intermittent asthma, and doesn't feel it would be in his best interest, or proactive to have him on any maintenance medications. He actually said the best thing to do is try to keep him away from other sick kids! Like that is possible!!
Labels: health, homeschooling, Jeff, Kira, Parker
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Monday, November 27, 2006
BOO to Dr. Phil
Did you know Dr. Phil now airs at night? Well, the other night, Jeff and I stopped on it because Dr. Phil is talking about the "Great School Debate", and had some radical unschoolers on as well as some more traditional homeschoolers, and of course some teachers, public school officials, etc. We stopped to watch it, thinking it was going to be viewed objectively and with equal consideration for all sides. WOW. I was actually surprised at how ill-informed he seemed to be. Still, it didn't really upset me, because it was pretty much a "common" view. But Jeff -- I didn't know how passionately he felt about homeschooling until then!
Anyhoo, my point is that it was very biased and unbalanced. For example, he had a woman who had been homeschooled and felt socially-inept come on and essentially beg others to not homeschool their kids, but did not have someone who either had been public-schooled come on and say the same about that, or someone who had been homeschooled and loved it come on. That would have felt more balanced IMO.
The highlight was when this woman stated that she was scared for the kids of the radical homeschoolers and for herself, in case those kids in the future had her health in their hands ... I guess I found it funny, because her concern is that they wouldn't be "book-learned", even though she's neglected the fact that in order to BE in charge of her health, one would have to get into and complete college, and post-graduate work, probably Med school! Just seemed farcical to me.
I used to like Dr. Phil, and it isn't just this episode that has started changing my mind. I liked him much more when he was once a week, at the behest of Oprah.
Labels: homeschooling, Jeff, parenting
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Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Returning to FSU?
The biggest update is that Jeff is up in Tallahassee today for a 2nd interview for a position as Marketing Director for the Oglesby Student Union at Florida State University. It seems to be between him and another woman. We'd have to move as it is about 2 to 2.5 hours away. It is more responsibility, and we assume better pay. We are both FSU alum, but like the community we have here. We aren't going to worry about it too much until/if he gets an offer.
Labels: Jeff, university
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Thursday, October 12, 2006
"It's A Done Deal"
Jeff's job is being cut.
Supposedly they are laterally moving him, but everything is being done and said behind his back, and so we haven't been told anything first hand.
I'm angry, resentful, and a little scared.
I think the Dean of this college needs to be let go, since he led them into a multi-million dollar debt. And the fact that he's not even being up-front is just infuriating. He's a "nice guy", but is apparently incompetent.
So, the highest probability is that Jeff will be moved from the entire college level to a departmental level ... doesn't make ANY sense!! And, because of how the college works, I believe that by being moved, he will be undergoing a new "probationary period" where he is ineligible to apply for any other university-wide position. Including the University webmaster position that may be becoming available in the near future.
Stupid, sucks, etc.
Labels: Jeff, stress, university
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Monday, July 10, 2006
Crazy Busy July
I can't believe how busy my life seems to have become -- my calendar just seems crazy! I am actually looking forward to mid-August, when Parker's classes end and everyone else is starting to get crazy with the start of school! We still haven't signed Parker up for preschool, and the closer we get to that time, it seems the less likely we are to do so, especially with the classes he's taking at O2BKids.
So, for me --
1) I'm still doing lots of work on our business, including a conference brochure, the birthday party company still, an architecture-related international service, and a couple of others. We have one client who is refusing to pay us right now, and they owe us about $600!! I'm very "put out!".
2) I am still effectively running the playgroup for Kira, which involves keeping about 10 moms, working and not working, organized enough to keep regular meetings. We've just completed our first complete 2-month rotation, and people are even more excited about it than before (before the whole group was going to just peter out, so this is awesome!).
3) I am now on the board of MOMS Club here, doing the newsletter, and helping as we sister a new group. It has actually been really fun, and I've already learned a lot more about my community.
For Jeff --
1) He's as swamped with freelance as I have been, as well as trying to revamp our entire website including a complete portfolio -- it is quite the undertaking!!
2) His work may be in for some upheaval, though I can't talk about it yet, since it doesn't go public until the end of the week.
For Parker --
I love this boy!! He can be a pain in the neck, but he's so sweet, so smart, and so full of energy!
He's really great with all of the family he's been meeting (though at times he's TOO friendly with strangers. I really need to work with him on a healthy distrust ...)
His big thing is that he absolutely WILL NOT let me cut his hair. I had to cut his bangs recently, but that was all he'd allow. I should have known this was coming with all the fussing he often does about it.
He totally loved having my mom (his Oma) come for a visit, and to go with them to his Great-Granny's house.
Of course, that means that I'm having to deal with him stealing my cell phone and calling them every chance he gets and him constantly talking about going to visit them or them coming here.
Parker mostly loved spending time with his 12-year old second cousin, Ross. They really had lots of fun and Parker talks about going back to see him.
That's them at the fireworks on the 4th.
Kira --
She's become such a firecracker! She's very smart -- I think moreso than Parker! She says lots and lots of words, uses a fork/spoon, already remembers/reads books, and is a pretty darn happy girl (until it is sleep time).
More than that, she ADORES her Grampa (my dad). Oh my goodness, I've never seen a child take to a non-parent like that! She often ran to him instead of to me! I loved it.
She also favored my mama, but not nearly the same. Still, it was a nice reprieve for me.
She was much more shy meeting the extended family, like her Great-Grandma Morris (Jeff's grandmother) above, and her Great-Aunt Kathy below.
She always seems to have a serious look on her face, like Parker did. It is almost like she is trying to completely digest and comprehend the world before she's 2!!
Okay, I'm including the following out of obligaton:
I have some videos I have to download from my camera to share. As much as I adore my kids, more and more I feel like we're done. Maybe I'll change my mind -- I'm only 33, and they are only 4-1/2 and 17 months. We'll see.
Labels: community, family, homeschooling, Jeff, Kira, Kristin, milestones, Parker, Union Design Photo
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Monday, June 12, 2006
Safe or Sorry...
Well, Jeff's work -- The University -- sent everyone home early today and told them not to come in tomorrow because of Tropical Storm Alberto. I think it is overkill, but I guess after last year, they want to be safe than sorry.
Labels: Jeff, university
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